Tag Archives: screaming

I Love My Nieces and Nephews But . . .

I don’t like it when they:

  • Try to strangle me.
  • Puke. (especially when you try to hold then closer to show your love) Then puke again. (and on the mouth)
  • Blame me for something. (“She gave me that ridiculous amount of hot chutney that will give me loose motions” *points at me*)
  • Ask questions which can never be answered (“Why don’t you have money?”)
  • Throw flour over me and play “Evade the ghost”.
  • Start crying when I call them.
  • Start smelling and depositing snot all over my newest tube of lipgloss.

But you know, all in all, kids are awesome.

I cannot wait for them to grow up though.

Until then:

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Gah! Two Years Already . . .

So WordPress very kindly reminded me that today is the two year anniversary of my blog.

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Why, thank you.

I started this thing mainly out of boredom and mixed feelings of hey-I-should-get-more-stuff-to-boast-about and hey-people-are-idiots-let’s-turn-to-the-internet.

I’m not sure what to do with this blog anymore. Mainly because when i started this, I was just getting into writing for other people and I didn’t know how.

Most of what I’ve written in the early stages include masterpieces ranging from “When she was talking about Peace, why did I have an image of flamingoes down by the lake?” to “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Yes, well . . .

I digress. I really don’t know what to do with this blog anymore so if humans/genetically advanced lifeforms/that guy I met on the bus is reading this, please deign to read comment praise maniacally. Praising maniacally. Yes that works.

Meanwhile, I’ll have cake.

Wait . . . Where did it go?

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Aaaaah.

*backs away slowly*

Never mind.

I Have a Lot to Pity Myself For

Really? I don’t see the perspective. This is humiliating. *I sit in the corner to pity myself*

My blogger friend Hobbles is throwing a pity party on her blog. To see what it is actually about, click here.

For  those of you who know, I am going to pity myself in bullet points since I am too lazy to . . . well think.

  • Hobbles is not actually a friend. She can be called a pseudo-friend. If I ever meet her in person, I’ll probably be too shy to say ‘Hi’. *social fail*
  • I am too lazy. *the reason for being a social fail*
  • AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <<<This is called eliciting some good ol’ frustrated screaming. Why, you ask? Because I am pitying myself, you thick-headed human.
  • I didn’t get some oil colours I was desperately seeking. Oh this cruel world!
  • I didn’t get something else I don’t remember the name of. Or rather I am too lazy to remember the name of.
  • Problems of exams! One finished on previous Friday. The next starts in the next month. *midterms*
  • I’ll fail.
  • I think I jinxed that.
  • I think i jinxed that too.
  • Great. Now I am officially confused about the meaning of ‘Jinxed’.
  • Cockroach climbing my leg! Go away! Go away! I hate you!
  • LATE FOR THE PITY PARTY. Wait, no. I was too busy pitying myself to pity myself in the pity party.

I have no idea what to pity myself for anymore.  Maybe I should pity myself for not knowing to pity myself.

  • I pity myself for not knowing how to pity myself.